Books...

Another tale told by me,hehe...
A few days ago, i went to the movies and bought a book which i have waited so long for...
Two whole years waiting and finally i got the book,hahaha...
The book is "Inkdeath" the third book from the "Inkheart" trilogy...
However, the movie was so boring,jgn tengok....
Buy the book,its better....
Now,i'm on my way reading this new book of mine...
Padahal i have another book yg xabis baca lagi,hahaha...
Its called "The Pillars Of The Earth" by Ken Follet...
I only read a few pages of it and it already struck me as a great book...
But i'd rather finish my book that i've waited so long for first,hehe...

Finally my brother is going to work!!!
After i don't know how many long years of just staying at home doing nothing but enjoying and making himself get in trouble all the time...
He will be going to KL on Sunday,i think...
And he would be working with my uncle which has a consultancy agency or company or i don't know,hehe...
But the fun part is that he gets to go to Sabah and The Philippines....
I am so jealous of him...
I wish i could take his place but i have to do more "important" stuff at home like cook, clean, wash, take care of my sisters etc...
Well,at least my parents don't worry much about my sisters when i take care of them...
After moving,i'll be free to work and i can't wait to hehe...

Ordinary Days...

Section 1:
There's nothing much that happened these 4,5 days of mine...
Abah balik dari Tanjung Malim,suka sgt kalau dia balik coz abah boleh bawak jalan2,hehe...
Mcm budak kecik but that's the truth,hahaha...
Today,i went thru my closet of clothes,mak suruh,and seperated the clothes that i want and don't want...
Mak wants to give then to those who needs it more...
There were tonnes of stuff that i gave away,sayang gak some stuff but from letting 'em rot,baik bagi orang,dapat pahala sikit...
Yesterday pegi tesco and masa balik my dad made the most stupid joke of all that made me laugh until now,hehe...
Nak cte sini xbest,myb some other time (^_^)
Owh,btw i met WAWA,my classmate while studying in Arau...
She is working there (tesco) (^_^)

Section 2:
One thing that is bothering me is WORK...
I still have no idea what i'd like to be or work as...
I wish i just could get married to a prince and be a princess and help my prince rule the world and make it a better place...
But that's impossible...
Sumenye dasar politik je skrg and some of these politic ppl only think of themselves... ~not all,just some of them~...
Well,back to WORK...
I'd love to be a teacher and teach english but i'd have to go back to "school" and take TESL for another 2 years....
By then i'll be 26,too old...
I also wanna like further my studies but my dad said i'd better work first...
Sometimes when i tell my dad what i wanna do,he will be like "no,do this,no do that"...
Kinda frustrating and makes my spirit drop to ground zero....
And at times when i ask "abah,tell me what can i do?",he'd go "do something you like,find something u take interest of"...
But when i do,ade2 je his i-dont-know-what lectures about if i do this,i have to do that yada yada yada...
Stuck,torn,clueless...
That's how i feel right now...

Section 3:
In a state like mine,i wish i had something to do to make me forget about all my worries....
Ok,this is the relationship part...
At least if i was working,i'd be busy doing my job and having less time thinking about less important stuff like this...
How the hell am i gonna get out of this mess?
I'm facing the truth and taking it quite ok,its not that bad but the wanting to have someone there for me is so strong...
Well,like it or not,i still do have to face it....
Just hope that i will still keep being strong...

Matters Of The Heart...

This must be lame but this is what all teenagers are going thru...
I am glad for what had happen between me and him and also her...
Because if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be this strong...
I also thank our Mighty Lord for giving me the strength to go thru this awful agony kinda feeling...
I never thought that I would be unlucky in love...
All those years I held on was just a waste...
I had always realized that this was just a game to him but i kept on holding on for maybe one day he would notice how much I had loved him...

After all those years of torture, the final decision I took was to turn to God...
That was the wisest thing I did in the whole 5 years with him...
I did some prayers that finally lead me to the truth and at times I wonder why didn't I do this in the first place...
The first time I did the prayer, someone told me about a website, an Islamic website...
The articles cover a lot of topics that we have doubts on and one of it is about teenagers and love...
When I read all those articles, I realized that what I have been doing all this time was wrong and I never knew that taking coz of the lack of knowledge in my own Islamic religion...
While reading some of those articles, came a sense of "keinsafan" in my heart...
I actually cried when I realized of all the sins that I have done and how much He loves us...
All we have to do is have faith in what He has in store for us...
The second day, I got a clear answer about him which I was so glad for...
However, I wasn't torn at all inside...
I felt a sense of freedom and peacefulness in my heart...
And I knew that it all came from Him...
The love we should be searching for is the love in God for trying to find love in another may turn out to be a waste and hurts in the end...
But once that you have found the love in God, He will always be there for you and the feeling is so wonderful and the sense of peacefulness is so alluring...

However, humans will always be humans....
I still have a bit of jealousy in my heart when I think that they are together....
But I wish for their happiness for one day I will too find the happiness, the day my wedding day comes,hahaha...
Tak mo dh cintan cintun nie, menyakitkan je, nk trs kawen je hahaha...
Finally, kuar gak my bhasa melayu,hehehe....

Change....

Hi,
I'm new here so mntk tunjuk ajar ye...
Memula,i thought i didnt want to make this blog but kwn2 ajak so i went on doing it....
I don't really know what to write about coz my days are so alike...
Everyday the thing,the same chores...

But today I'd like to share one thing that changed a bit of me when reading a friends blog...
She wrote about improving...
Improving everyday,day to day basis and that got me...
Since that,i started to learn cooking,helping out my mom more and trying to be a better person...
Tp mcm biasa la kn,it takes time to change,but for what i see,bit by bit,can make a huge difference in the future...
To anakcikmad/lizi,thanks for ur blog,it was a real eye opener for me =)