Last Two Weeks...

Its been about two weeks not writing in my blog...
And in these two weeks, so much had happened...
Well, not that much but it is kind of a big deal to me...
First of all, i got to be a teacher!!! (^_^)
Walaupun just a guru sandaran but it will be a big opportunity for me to gain some experience and help me in my KPLI or DPLI interview (if i ever get it)...
I never did think i wanted to be a teacher in my "younger years"...
Dulu rasa cm x best la konon...
But now, all grown up, i really wanna become a teacher...
At first i wanted to become a lecturer but than when i got to be a guru sandaran and started teaching these cute little creatures, i really do wanna be a teacher, lebih2 lagi a primary school teacher hehe...

The process:
Monday morning went to PPD Permatang Pasir...
Went thru an interview, took about almost half an hour...
Questions were like s**t, gelabah pnye pasal xdapat nk jawab a few questions...
Tp alhamdulillah, myb he (the interviewer) knew i was all shaky...
He didn't tell me anything, all he did was put my application letter in an envelope, stapled it and said, "Pegi jmpe tuan haji musa dgn mak dibawah ye"...
I was like, (dalam hati) "well,did i like get it or not?"...
Bnde tu pun kne staple, xleh nk bukak and tengok lak...
So, keluarlah saya dari bilik interviewer tersebut and tgk2 my mom sedang sembang2 dgn sape ntah...
Tunggu la mak kt situ for almost 15minutes...
Sebaik sahaja ibuku keluar dari bilik encik ape ntah namanya, kami menuju ke arah pejabat Tuan Haji Musa...
So, once in the room, he opened the sealed envelope...
My heart was pounding to know the results...
One part of me didn't wanna know coz the person in front of me will be telling me if i got rejected...
That would be so embarrassing but what else could i do?...
So, here goes the moment of truth...
"Sekolah mana nak pegi nie?", he said...
Alhamdulillah, i got it, hahaha...
At first he wanted to send to a secondary school but than my mom asked for Bukit Minyak Primary School, so i went there which is also my sister's school and my moms previous school where she had teach before becoming a headmaster...
Tuan Haji Musa said to start on that same day and that was so shocking and freaked me out coz i am not even ready yet hahaha...
I thought i was supposed to start by March, early of the month...
But what the hell, its now or never right?

Oh, I forgot to mention a friend of mine also went to the interview and he also got the job and we started on the same day =)

Lepas teman my friend g bank and makan, we went straight home and to our schools...
The best thing was when i arrived, i talked for a while with the Penolong Kanan and head straight to class, x dapat duduk and tgk syllabus langsung...
Imagine je la how awkward i felt walking in the class...
Naseb la i teach kids darjah satu n dua...
Kalau teach kids darjah 5 ke 6 ke, x ke mati aku hahaha...

After a few days teaching, mmg sangat pening jugak coz majority of my students don't know how to read...
How am i to teach if they don't know how to read, right?
But that will be a challenge for me to keep on going and breakthrough...
At least when i leave that school, the kids learn something from me...
And looking how the kids are with me, i guess they are enjoying my lessons...
I do hope they learn something from me in my lessons...

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This part is about another chapter of my life...
The part where everyone will face in one phase of their life...
The thing i really never thought would happen has happened...
The EX came back yet again...
Just when i just moved on and feeling great with my life...
But i don't really feel anything...
I didn't reply his messages, making excuses that i don't have credit...
Than he called where i picked up coz he has changed his number...
Ade la a few times i didn't pick up so he went on calling my house number instead...
So annoying...

Two days ago he called and being a human being with lots of empathy, i just went on talking to him...
We had a great laugh and chit chatted a bit...
He called me again at 2am, i of course was asleep said i wanted to sleep so we didn't talk...
And he called again yesterday, a few times...
And last night, i couldn't take it anymore so scolded him...
I was really mad for what he had done to me all these years...
Segala kuar la malam td dengan kata2 kesat yg xpenah ku terpikir nk kata padanya...
~kesat tu xde la bermaksud amat kesat but 'p mampuih' tu agak kejam la jgk kn~
And he accepted it and at the same time he told me EVERYTHING, yup, EVERYTHING...
After all the fighting, we forgave each other for what had happen and agreed on being friends...

During all the screaming and fighting a few tears did came out but i tried to hold them back...
How vulnerable he makes me feel till now...
He said he can never get over me even how hard he tries...
I just told him to try harder...
I told him to turn back to the One and he said he is always praying and mengaji'ing but even doing all those stuff he still thinks about me...
So i told him to do solat hajat and istikharah and see how it goes...
I also told him to get back together with 'her' but he said he can't coz even when he is with 'her', he runs back trying to find me again...
Is it all lies? I don't care coz i already told him i am never going back to him again unless he asks my hand in marriage...

What will happen next?
I don't know...
I'm just gonna have to wait and see...
But i am happy now...